February 12, 2018

Why relationships break + Earthy tones

Hi fellow readers

Two thousand and eighteen is not going as planned. Lots of hiccups, misunderstandings and errors!

I've always been positive and tried to keep good vibes near me. How do I do that? 
Humans need humans; emotions nurture when they merge or clash with emotions. Therefore, keeping people with positive roots, is important for me.

Positive roots means - people, from time to time, experience bad days, sudden influx of emotions and general confusion. But, what remains put is there nature in essence. If they are positive as a person, it would reflect in everything that they do.

Today, I shall talk about these feelings, emotions, nature and personality that might lead to heartbreaks and distrust.
Also, loving the early onset of spring in Delhi. More on my outfit after the deep-dosage of relationship talks.

Five reasons why relationships break (indeliberately!)

1) Coinciding nature - We are humans: expecting is in our nature and for some, a habit. We are not used to bowing down to anybody without experience or directly being told so. Nevertheless, each person is different. Our wiring is unique, mental frequencies different and interpretation dissimilar. 

But, there can be only a limited permutations in the world that can make the entire human race unique in absolutely everything! That is why, we find that no two people are the same yet have some things in common. I'm saying coinciding and not conflicting nature because, because of these similarities and disimalrities, that we tend to coincide some parts of us.

We may want the same thing, but in a different way or different time altogether. When, even wanting the same things (or not the same thing), reaches a road to a dead-end, it is the safest place to assume that you go in different directions together, or apart. Here, 'we are good friends even after parting ways', comes into picture. It is true and very much workable!

2) When everything is not enough - There are some people who have been given everything and still nothing is enough for them. Emotional capacity, loving tenacity, good health and love; are a few must-haves for a healthy relationship. While for others, the world is upside down and still, they are happy to have 'at least' the notion of good relationship(s) around.

There is a third category of people who may have some and may want more. They are happy with what they got but a little more doesn't harm no one. This is the charasteristic of a person whose head is sorted and priorities set straight. They have always known what they want and what is (or who is) the most important thing (or person) in their life.

When the above kind of people, meet the first two kinds, they try to fix them. They think that since, these two kinds don't have their act together, maybe they need a little push? No.
They don't understand that they too, have reached where they are, after several experiences. Everyone actually learns from their own mistakes or experiences. Therefore, if not completely broken, such relationships have cracks that might or might not be filled.

3) Living in the past - whatever you do, you can't seem to get out of the circle. After all, life doesn't go forward or backward in a straight line. It is a circle that keeps on going. It doesn't have a start or an end, technically speaking.

Some people, do something to mend their past actions. They will apologize to you for something they have done in the past. They will make it up (or try to) that day and by the end of the day, mess it up, again! The next day, they wake up with a feeling of disappointment that they have brought to you and again, the cycle starts.

Living in the past, is a constant for them. They are constantly in a need to mend things and cannot LIVE in the present. Here, survival takes precedence. When a person is in a relationship with a 'mender', there is always something to look back to. Each day is a battle to start fresh or mend previous actions Sooner or later somebody gives up and some get a full stop they were waiting for.

4) Two friends - there were two friends, ego and love. Both had been living together in a beautiful apartment for 10 years now. Love needed some change, breath of fresh air and some excitment. Ego was against this idea and never gave a good response to love's request. 

One day, their house caught fire and they had no option but to jump out of the window. Love was ready to jump and looked back to see if ego was ready. Ego wasn't! It was sitting in the same chair that it used to, everyday for the last 10 years. Love yelled at it, "Hurry up, it would be too late". Ego replied, "You go if you want to. I'm not leaving."

Love pleaded, requested, demanded and sobbed but, ego didn't budge! Love had no choice but to stay with ego. How could it leave ego? It was love for 10 years!

They both died. Love died because of ego.

I don't think I have to explain this one.
5) They have options - relationships break when they have optinons. They give up too easily because they know they have friends, family, hobbies and self-respect to fall back to. They enter into relationship because of the above 4 categories - either they are (or met via) family, friends, found in hobbies or found someone with a similar set of values and respect for self or others.

Such people ignore the need for nurturing both together as they are busy nurturing themselves in the old ways. They don't feel the need for a change. If it works, it is wonderful. They have found someone who shares everything they care about. If not, it is fine. They will go back to being #1 (point above). Resorting to their own self, is not an issue for them. They don't need drastic measures to bring themselves back to reality because, they were already there. Nothing had changed for them as it is.

Needless to say, they would have loved the other person with all their heart. But it didn't work out? It's okay. They have options.

So yes, these are the reasons that I have realized. I know they are not cliched 'want different things, different personalities, etc.'. These are, from years of experiences and observation. Let me know your thoughts below.

 

Now, about the dress. I bought this in Diwali. Remember, on my Instagram stories, I asked you guys to vote between this dress and the one which I finally wore?

I am in love with the colour. With so much of festivities going around, thought I would show you a colour or two, from India :) (Most of my readers are from USA, Ukraine, Russia and then India).

One could wear it with or without leggings. I chose leggings because I know it would be an hour long shoot and I was already very cold. Paired black wedges with leopard print details in the heels.

Funny story about this shoot - My brother wanted to have his shoot as well. We wanted a different background than greenery. After half hour of discussion, we did nothing but walked for a minute to the opposite end of our society and clicked this. Hope you enjoy (LOL)





 

 










 




 

 


Which one is your favourite?

WEARING:
Suit cum dress: Fabindia, Wedges: Milanoo, Cuff right hand: Forever21, Cuff left hand: Zaful

Much love
xoxo
Akanksha

11 comments :

  1. I love your dress, thanks for sharing, you look stunning!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is so true great points!!
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  3. Great post, very interesting. :)
    Maybe follow for follow ?
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  4. Great post, i agree with you. And the dress is so lovely! The colour is really beautiful ^^
    xx

    Freak Muffin Blog

    ReplyDelete
  5. Beautiful dress <3 You look amazing.
    Have a nice day
    My blog

    ReplyDelete
  6. Love this post! :)

    Just followed you, waiting for you to follow back *

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  7. Amazing post, dear! A big hello from Germany!
    Hugs ♥
    LIANA LAURIE | My new video

    ReplyDelete
  8. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on break ups with us. I think living in the past is especially dangerous.
    Love you blog, dear. Keep it up.

    David Hill Guildford

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for commenting. I really appreciate it, Akanksha :)
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